Tuesday, June 9, 2009

The One That Got Away, Thank God!

Lazy blogger in da house!

It has been a very strange week and a half around theses parts.

Let me start from the beginning of time though, OK...

Back in high school I had a boyfriend, who we will call Romeo, which sounds appropriate, since at some point in my life I actually thought I was going to die without him.

We were in love. It was passionate, infuriating, intense, and confusing.

We spent a lot of time together. He lived in a group home, and the weekends he would get passes to come stay with my family.

He was my date to the Senior Ball.

After high school I did a lot of things all wrong, like drugs. He was there for that part of my life and it caused a ridiculous amount of problems between the two of us. I still have a box of letters from him, and most of them are of him begging me to quit doing drugs. It is really quite sad to read them.

He even bought me a ring and proposed marriage to me.

He converted to Mormonism for me.

I moved down to San Diego, and eventually he followed me down there and moved in with me.

One night he went out with my brother, who happened to be visiting from Sacramento and they walked around our apartment complex, looking for a party. I have no idea why, but when he came home from that kegger with that red cup, it just fueled my fire. I was soooo mad.

His mom came to visit from Utah shortly after that happened and I sent him home with her to live there.

I am sorry if my memories are so fuzzy, but it was over 10 years ago.

We continued to talk on the phone. We were still crazy in love. I moved back to Sacramento in December of 1998. He was in Utah. I wanted to start dating other guys. This pissed him off, so he told me never to call him again.

And I didn't.

That was March 8, 1999. His birthday.

Time went by, 10 years and 3 months, to be exact. I have thought about him on numerous occasions. Actually, I have thought about him quite a bit. Namely, every time I get mad at the Hubs, I look for him on myspace and on facebook. Obsessively. I have just always felt like there was no closure in our relationship. So for the past 10 years he has been my "What if?" My "Shoulda, coulda, woulda..." "The one that got away"...You get the picture.

So imagine my shock last week when I got home from a fantastic weekend of camping and checked my email to find that there was a message from him on myspace.

It read:

May 30, 2009 6:30 PM


please dont reply

It's taken me over a decade for this and I am so very proud of you and I am pleased and happy for you. You have a beautiful family and I wish the best for all of you but most of all, I'm sorry.
I've never forgotten you, p.l.a.s.t.i.c. (a high school nickname). I owe you so much. I could never repay you, I wouldn't know where to start.
Well, good luck and godspeed. You guys got the world to conquer. I'll never forget how amazing you are."

Immediately I ran to the garage to tell the Hubs that I got a message from my ex-boyfriend on myspace. He laughed. He is awesome like that. Never jealous.

Then I rushed over to Twitter and Facebook to announce on there that I got a message from an ex and asked people if I should reply or not. I got mixed reactions from everyone. It did not matter what anyone else said to do, I knew what I was going to do.

I waited a few days, then I replied.

Not at all surprising, he is unhappy in his relationship with his wife. He is married with 3 kids. She hates me. Apparently she was planning their wedding for November 27th, and he told her that there was NO WAY he was going to marry her on that day, because it is my birthday.

How do I know all this?

Besides the rampant messages being fired off back and forth between the two of us? We talked on the phone on Sunday. For OVER three hours.

We agreed that it was like talking to an old friend (actually, he said "Sister", but YUCK), and there is no harm coming out of it, but I have to tell you that I was really worried about what was going to happen if I talked to him.

Do you want to know what really happened?

I gained a greater appreciation for my husband, who is everything I ever wanted, and needed, and is everything that he is not.

God really knows what he is doing sometimes. And has a great way of working things out!


Anonymous said...

That sounds pretty intense. You know it's all good, when after reconnecting, you're so much more in love with and appreciate your husband more. I think I do that every time I see my ex.

Aimee said...

I'm so glad that story had a good ending (for you at least!) I was wondering if you were going to reply. (I don't see you as the type to follow orders) LOL

The JNJ Hasleton's said...

Congrats to the closure you now have. Good thing God knows what he's doing, cause you got some pretty cute kids out of it.

Rachel said...

Yeah for closure. You do have an amazing life and an amazing family!

MarvelousMOM said...

That is crazy. I'm glad you guys are able to be friends. Always great when things like that show you how great what you have is.

~Billie~ said...

Aww! What a great post! Craziness to think that an ex would write eyou after so many years... but so good to hear you got your Happy Ending. =)

misguidedmommy said...

i have a what if. there are days when i imagine running off into his rock in roll lifestyle and then there are days when i think THANK GOD!!!!!!!

but, that doesn't mean i don't still stop in and check his myspace here and there

followthatdog said...

I'm glad you appreciate the husband you have. It can be weird to talk to an ex, I'm happy it was a good experience for you.

mamikaze said...

that's crazy! don't we all want our exes to continue to pine after us for ten years. you handled it so much better than I would have.

Cristina Mathers said...

so true, so true. i remember when you posted about this on facebook. i think i said not to talk to him, but it sounds like it was a really good thing for you! it's so awesome to know that your life is just exactly how it was meant to be.

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